This is what happened during the Shenzhen summit between Xi Jinping, Vladimir Putin and Donald Trump, to be possibly held on Novembre 19th, 2026:
-Trump, entering the room late: hi Vlad, hi Jin, hooyah! You are the only two commies I’ve seen since landing here in Shanghai, ah, ah, ah
– Putin: grrrrr, GRREEE, Grroar, GRROOOOOAAAR, OOOOARRR (noise of an angry bear)
– Xi: Pscchhhhhh, FSSHHHH, PSCHOUOUAH, WASHHHPCHOUAUH (noise of a dragon spitting fire)
– Trump’s staff: its Shenzhen, Sir!
– Trump: yeah, Cheyenne, Schengen, whatever, beautiful city, Eiffel Tower and…
– Trump’s staff: Sir, that was Paris
-Trump: I know what I saw from the plane, you moron (he is right, the is an Eiffel Tower in Shenzhen, a bit smaller); you’re fired! Vlad, Jin, we’re here to split the world between us, its Malta all over again!
– Trump’s staff: Yalta, Sir?
– Trump: What the f…, as if I cared, Vlad, you get Asia, Jin, you get South America and me I get Europe
– Putin and Xi: GRREEE, GRROAAAR, OOARRR, FSSHHHH, PSCHOUOUAH, WASHCOUAUH
– Trump’s staff: oh, no, Sir, please, not Europe again! That’s not what we discussed, its Asia for M. Xi, Europe for M. Putin, with North Africa as a bonus, ah, ah, ah, and the US gets the rest of the world
– Yeah, ok, whatever, Vlad, Jin, I’ll tell you what, you can have all the countries around your digs, but I get the petrol, the gas and all the construction contracts, everywhere
Vladimir Putin and Xi Jinping mumble a few words that sound like orders, Trump agrees to all they want, they leave the room, and an hour after, President Trump attends a press conference.
– Trump: incredible me, I saved the world again, history will remember me for this Schengen summit, a miracle, so much better than the one in Malta, up yours Winston the lush, Joseph the hick, Franklin the crip!
– Press: what did you obtain exactly, Sir?
– Trump: gave Ukraine to Vlad, Taiwan to Jin and I’ll have a Trump tower in Moscow and Beij…
– Trump’s staff, cutting him off abruptly: back in the plane, quickly now!